Hangers: An Ikea Story

When I first arrived here last week, I discovered that I badly needed two things:

1. A very large glass for water at work, because the water machines self-dispense 2 oz cups, unless you have a bottle to select the "500ml bottle fill" option.
2. Clothes hangers.

While I was fairly certain I could deal with number one by going to any department store, number two was surprisingly tricky.  My first thought was about where I would go in the US, in order of increasing difficulty for New Yorkers: Bed, Bath and Beyond, Target, Ikea, and Wal-Mart.  Unfortunately, a bit of sleuthing and questioning determined that in fact there was nothing like Bed Bath, Target, or Wal-Mart in London.  Ikea, meanwhile, was rather far away.  Various grocery (Waitrose), department (Marks & Spencer) and catalog (Argos) stores were suggested and examined, but they were either ludicrously expensive (the first two) or out of stock (the latter).  Last week, I resigned myself that I would have to go to Ikea on Friday.

I sorted it all out - it was easy to get to Ikea from work, since it's on the same subway line as my office.  Getting home was a bit tricker because I would have a lot of things, and didn't want to backtrack.  A bit of quick research determined that I could take a bus to either the London Overground, a commuter railroad that stops by my house, or further along to a later station on the tube's Central Line, which also stops where I live.

Getting to Ikea was easy, and I had dinner at the restaurant (priced higher than I thought), followed by some easy shopping.  Except that they were out of the 49p/5 plastic hangers.  After all that!  Oh well, I got the wooden ones instead. 

Arms laden with bags full of hangers, bathroom organizers, storage boxes and tableware, I left Ikea to get to my bus.  However, as I was confused about precisely which way to go (I did not yet have my new phone, which I had been hoping would negate the need for a map book), I stopped at the first bus stop, and determined my location.  I also discovered that although there was not a direct bus from that stop to the Central Line, there was one to the Overground, which would save me a five minute walk.  Besides, I was interested to see the Overground, as I wasn't quite sure how to classify it.  So, when the bus arrived, I hope on.

Big mistake.

The bus immediately turned down an alleyway.  "Fine," I thought, "it's going a back route."  And indeed it did.  It went around and along and down every little dead-end alleyway in the neighborhood.  Finally, it emerged onto the main road, 50 yards down from where we had started, and turned back from whence we had come.  It not only was going the back way, but it was going the long way too.  It looped all the way around.  London has long loopy roads, so consider an arc shaped like a bridge - I wanted to go down the left side of the semicircle and then southwest - the bus went off the top of the semicircle, came back, then went down the right side, then meandered it's way all the way to the station.  The entire ride, which would have gotten me past the overground station and to the tube station in about 15 minutes took more than an hour.

Finally, I got to the overground, swiped in, and lugged all of my stuff to the proper platform (the furthest away) before hearing an announcement that there were no more trains going to my destination (south, on a particular branch).  Well, whatever.  I hopped on the first train going south on another branch, and got off the first stop. 

Fortunately, the London transport system is very good at posting bus maps everywhere, so I was able to find a bus stop a long block away that would take me home.  Turns out that it was a very good bus stop (the bus home came every 5-10 minutes, even at that time of night). 

Being a Friday night there were a few people in a compromised state sitting on the bench, comparing buses (they were making no sense).  As the bus pulled up, a lady said to me, rolling her eyes, "the things you hear on a Friday night."  I responded, "yes, indeed."  "Ugh, an American..."****

Anyway, it took me a couple of hours to get home, and although I was exhausted, I figure that the only way to really learn a city is to get lost in it, as long as you can find your way home.

****Ok, so she didn't say that, but she didn't respond, and it would have been much funnier if she had.